Falling In Love

Anyone who has ever experienced falling in love will know the amazing feelings you get…

...that 'rush of pleasure' that makes everything around you seem wonderful!

You think about the person you're in love with all the time, you sing along to love songs and the world seems a brighter, more sparkly place!

These are all feelings associated with happiness...

...because you're in love you're happy with yourself , with your situation…

and with your partner.

Everything you know about him or her, even their quirky characteristics, seems to be completely perfect.

So why do we feel this way?

Well, it's all very natural. We all want love…whether we know it or not.

We're biologically programmed to pair up and social pressures from everyday life (like seeing our friends in relationships, the media etc) make this desire stronger.

So first of all, we find someone that we're attracted to because of their physical appearance and their personality.

As we get to know them and still like them, we're naturally going to be starting to get excited…especially if he or she feels the same way about us.

This when our bodies start to release a number of chemicals and hormones, including pheromones, dopamine and serotonin, all of which activate the pleasure centre of the brain.

This leads to side effects like our hearts beating faster, loss of appetite, disturbed sleep and great feelings of excitement.

All these symptoms are probably very familiar to you!

Added to this, when we fall in love we're surrendering.

Psychologically speaking, we're opening up our hearts and letting go of any emotional blocks so that we can enter a new phase in our lives, full of exciting changes.

It's not called falling in love for nothing…it's a bit like the thrill of bungee jumping with all the highs and exhilaration of free-falling!

It's believed by scientists that this phase lasts for between one and half and three years.

Hopefully after this, a deep love takes over and the relationship moves into the mature, long-lasting stage of love.

But for some people, falling in love becomes addictive.

They crave the thrill they feel in the earlier stages of a relationship and often move onto a new relationship to satisfy this desire, without even knowing why they're doing it.

For other people, falling in love is a terrifying feeling. For one reason or another, they can't handle the intimacy of being close to another person and so they keep their barriers up.

Ever heard of 'love sickness'?

Well, it may surprise you to know that it's a diagnosed illness in people who find being in love too intense. They can become depressed, anxious and obsessive when they fall in love.

Seeing a therapist is very important for people who have problems with being in love so that they are able to develop healthy, loving relationships.

In the USA, a list of therapists can be found via The American Psychological Association. In the UK,the BACP should be able to help.

Because falling in love should be an amazing, rewarding experience that everyone enjoys.

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